My Muffin Top

I'm not sure I want to know what kind of Google searches are going to lead people to this post (fun fact, more than one poor soul has ended up here as a result of searching for "Pokemon eating sweets"), but I don't care - the more people know about today's Banana Chocolate Chip Muffins, the better!

I dunno, do I really need to sell you on muffins with chocolate in them? Vegan muffins and quick breads often end up unpleasantly gummy for some reason - any chemists here to clarify why this is so? - but these little treats are a happy exception. The insides are soft and fluffy, the tops are crunchy and sweet, and all the potassium and vitamins in the bananas cancels out the fact that you're eating chocolate for breakfast. Pro tip: I highly recommend eating these muffins warm for maximum chocolatey gooeyness.

Banana Chocolate Chip Muffins
adapted from Doron Peterson’s Sticky Fingers’ Sweets

Makes 16 muffins

¼ cup coconut oil
½ cup sugar
3 ripe bananas
½ tsp vanilla
¾ cup soymilk
2 ¼  cups flour
1 ½ tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
¼  tsp salt
½ tsp cinnamon
¼  tsp allspice
¼  tsp nutmeg
¾ cup chocolate chips

Preheat your oven to 350 F and pop paper liners into a muffin tin. You can also use a little bit of Earth Balance or coconut oil to grease the pan instead. In a medium bowl, cream together the coconut oil and sugar until it's super smoothly - this should only take a few minutes. In another bowl, mash the shit of your bananas. They should look like something a toddler might smear in her hair while you try to give her a snack.

Pre-smooshing. 

Add the bananas and the vanilla to your sugar mixture and stir until evenly incorporated. Then add the soy milk and slowly stir until everything is blended up really well. In a separate bowl, whisk the flour, baking powder, baking soda, salta, cinnamon, allspice, and nutmeg. Dump this into the wet batter and carefully stir together to avoid a spicy cloud of flour from settling all over your kitchen. Don't overstir here! Just mix until there aren't any patches of flour or weird banana clumps visible in the concoction.

Bliss. 

Finally, the most important step - toss in the chocolate chips and stir the batter a couple of final times, stopping as soon as all the nuggets are mixed into the batter. Use a big spoon to drop the batter into the prepared muffin cups.

Taste-test liberally. 

You can fill them up almost to the top, and be sure to monitor for appropriate chocolate chip distribution. Pop the muffin tin in the oven for about 30 minutes, until a toothpick stuck into the center of a muffin comes out clean. Enjoy!

Too Much Thyme

You know how when you buy herbs at the grocery store, they usually come in just ridiculously immense bushels? Like, when I am ever going to need a 3 pounds of mint or cilantro? The solution here is undoubtedly for me to start an herb garden so that I can just pick up a couple springs of rosemary or green onions when I need them, but in the meantime I have several fistfuls of thyme sitting on my counter so we're making Dark Chocolate Thyme Cookies.

Not that I'm mad, mind you! There's something deliciously sophisticated about these little gems. Maybe it's the rich dark chocolate, or the savory-sweet combo, or the delicate crumbly texture - regardless, making these will make you feel like a real adult. Or it'll make you annoy your girlfriend with lots of stupid thyme/time puns while you bake...it's a toss up.

These cookies are super quick and easy to make. You probably have all the ingredients in your pantry already, aside from the thyme (unless you're my mom and you have a beautiful garden full of herbs...hi Mom!), so there's really no excuse - grab your mixer and get to baking!

Dark Chocolate Thyme Cookies
Veganized from The View From Great Island

Makes 30 cookies

¾ cup Earth Balance
½ cup powdered sugar
½ cup cocoa powder
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 3/4 cup flour
2 tablespoons fresh thyme, finely chopped
½ cup semisweet chocolate chips

In a medium bowl, cream the Earth Balance, powdered sugar, and cocoa powder until they're super smooth, then add the vanilla and stir a couple more thymes (hee). This will all look a little liquidy, which is fine!

Butter, sugar, and chocolate - i.e. everything good and holy

Add the flour and mix just until it's nicely blended into the dough. Pour in the thyme and chocolate, stir to combine, and stick the whole bowl into your fridge for about an hour so the dough has a chance to firm up a little bit.

This is where the magic happens

Preheat the oven to 375 F and line a couple of cookies sheets with aluminum foil. Grab your dough and make little cookie balls - they should be more or less the size of a walnut. Space them out evenly on the cookie sheet and pop them in the oven for about 10 minutes, or until they're firm on the outside and have lost their squishy texture.

Thyme to bake these suckers

Once you take the cookies out of the oven, let them set on the baking sheet for 5 minutes before you transfer them to a wire rack/your mouth. Eat with pinkies up!